Optometry Jokes

Why did the phone wear glasses? … Because it lost its contacts!

What tunes do optometrist’s listen to? …… itunes!

What happened to the lab tech when he fell into the lens grinder? …. He made a spectacle of himself!

Patient: “I keep getting a stabbing pain in my eye when I drink coffee.”..Optometrist: “Have you tried taking the spoon out of the cup?

Why did the cyclops close his school? ….. He only had one pupil!

Sol had lived a long life. On his deathbed he asked, “I just need to know, which one was clearer, A or B?

The optometrist asked the Czech man, “Can you read the bottom line? … The patient replied, “Of course! CZWXNQSTACZ I even know the guy!”

Patients come in embarrassed that they sat on their glasses. …We fix them, then we tell them, “Well, you know what they say, hindsight is 2020.”

A little boy put on his very first glasses…….”Wow! These are like HD vision!” High Definition! (True story!)

These jokes just keep getting cornea and cornea!